Heal from Depression

She had come to me to heal from depression. A court mandated client I had been seeing for several months, after she attempted suicide by jumping onto an electric fence.  She was making tremendous strides in her recovery from depression and despair.   After several months of work together, she looked at me with pleading eyes and asked if I would be willing to look at her scar.

I didn’t know what to do. On one hand, I must admit that I was more than curious.  On the other hand I didn’t want to violate any ethical boundaries.  The scar, which she kept covered by wearing long pants, was near her ankle, a part of the body that people often leave uncovered.  Still, if it was as grotesque as she said it was, I was concerned that my reaction might create more harm than good if my body language expressed even the slightest amount of disgust.  However, the harm caused to the therapeutic relationship and to her self-esteem might be greater if I turned down the offer entirely.  There were no ethics experts on hand to hash this out with and my social work training (which I like to think was comprehensive) didn’t prepare me for this one.  I told her that if she thinks it would further her healing that she could show me.

The scar wasn’t so bad, and she felt great about having been brave enough to risk humiliation and rejection.  Although my sole intention was to be there for her in a respectful and helpful way;  and although it was not my intention to deliver any specific message, the message she received was that her scar isn’t so bad and that that she is more alright than she ever gave herself credit for.

More often than not, simple openness and respect have the greatest healing power.